Like, That's Just Your Opinion, Man

I shared this video on across my Social Media,  including a few wargaming Facebook Groups. 

I prefaced it with:

This, so much.

The only wrong way to wargame is when you aren't having fun.

Unpainted, poorly painted, wrong uniforms... if YOU are having fun, then you're doing it right.

And the only place I got any push back was a Napoleonic Wargaming Facebook Group. Someone felt that if you weren't taking it seriously and getting every detail correct, or playing with unpainted figures, then you were just being lazy.

An argument followed, which I decided to resolve by Blocking that voice and leaving that Group. Because no one needs that kind of negativity.

Personally, I paint as well as I can, and don't put unpainted figures out for a game, and you all know that I like a well dressed table.

But that's me. It's not for everyone. I've played some memorable games with unpainted figures because the people around me were fun to play with. 

So just.... wow.

It's no wonder Napoleonics has such a bad reputation. 

Big Guns

 ...there was a heavy battery operating just beneath the ridge, at a kept interval of minutes, with unnerving inevitability, as a malign chronometer, ticking off with each discharge an exactly measured progress toward a certain and prearranged hour of apocalypse. (In Parentheses by David Jones. p.135)

I needed two more guns for Brequar Manor, so Don found an .stl for a First World War British 8 inch howitzer and printed a full battery of four. I was wrestling with various ways to get enough gun crew with my Coftyrans when the Tollyn-Mearyn were released. I got extra bodies and extra empty hands printed to make gun crew, as well as extra crew from the field gun set.

OK some of the poses are extra dynamic. But whatever, they're excited. I only had three plastic shells, so I gave a couple spare sponges from some black powder artillery equipment in my bits box to give their hands something to do. I've seen modern gunners use sponges to make sure the breech is clear of any burning cinders before the next charge is thrust in.

I did two crews with the hats and two crews with the helmets.
 

Since I issued their very modern looking recoilless rifle to the Crusaders and Toulmorese, I have given this misprinted German 150 mm infantry gun to the Tollyn-Maeryn. It's more old fashioned looking and I think fits better with the more old fashioned looking uniforms and spiked helmets.

I'm also getting Don to print me some trench mortars, I think these figures would look ok acting as crew for those as well, since I've got 4 sets of them.

They can also crew a Maxim gun set up on the edge of a trench at a pinch too.

I'm sure they'll welcome the extra firepower when defending against Crusader (or Coftyran!) assaults.

Now I just need three more gun pits so that I can lay out the battery at Brequar Manor properly.

I'm Not Crying, You Are: In Which Rabbitman Re-Reads The Lord of the Rings

The final pages of The Lord of the Rings, and the death of Theoden never fail to leave me a little misty eyed.

If you haven't been paying attention, I'm a bit of a Tolkien fan, as I declared way back here. Some folks seem to think that C.S. Lewis is better, but they're usually Anglicans, so they're biased. Tolkien's craft, command of language, development of character is just vastly superior. And he doesn't smash you over the head with his theology. But it's there if you're paying attention.

OK, since White Supremacists seem to try to co-opt Tolkien as well as everything else, maybe he's too subtle. But White Supremacists aren't terribly deep thinkers, so it could be right in their face and they'd miss it, just like they missed that Homelander in The Boys is a Bad Guy. But women's agency, indigenous oppression, the rejection of Power, enviromentalism, the dangers of Corporate Greed, and the value of small things done with love are all there. Tolkien tells us that the mighty only exist, not to set things right, according to their wills, but to make space so that the small folk can build a better world, one garden at a time. 

Something the rich and mighty in our world should think about. 

I decided to return to my comfort blanket this spring because of all the stuff going on in the outside world, where it seems, when I'm feeling overwhelmed, that the Power of Mordor is growing. As I re-read The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings, I noticed that all of the things that Jackson cut out of the movies are things of great value that I was only too happy to appreciate again.

There's more of the Shire, especially as Frodo and Sam move to Crickhollow. And if you're a Hobbit-head, and would like to live in the Shire, like me, then these chapters are super rich.

Merry and Pippin are actually intelligent and capable young hobbits, not the clowns that the movies cast them as. And Farmer Maggot. He squares up to a freaking Nazgûl! But this is an early indicator that Tolkien thinks real goodness and power comes from being rooted in the soil, oh... like Sam.

The Old Forest, Tom Bombadil, and the Barrow Downs, all show us that there are perils and powers beyond Sauron and the White Council. I think Tom Bombadil and Goldberry are present to show us what Middle Earth would have been like without Melkor's Rebellion. That was going to be my Ph.D thesis in the alternative timeline where I got to be a Professor of Literature. 

The Pukel-Men. These, if anything, are an indictment of Numenorean Imperialism, which is touched on in The Silmarillion, but the emphasis on Elendil and his heirs pushes the conquering, oppressive expansion of  the Numenorean Empire into the background. We don't learn in the movies of Numenor's spiritual and literal fall into darkness. Same with the Dunlendings. In the movies we don't really get why the Dunlendings hate the Rohirrim so much. You get pushed from fertile farmlands to scrabble a living in the mountains and see how you feel? The Dunlendings, full of hatred and anger, fall victim to the lies of Saruman. The Pukel-Men however, recognize the greater threat and side with the powers of Good.

The Fields of Cormallen and the whole long gentle winding down after the fall of Baradur. Wars just don't wrap up neatly, and everyone goes home. Troops didn't return home from the First World War until 1919. This part of the story gives Tolkien the time to tie up all the lose ends, and give us more time with beloved characters. 

The Scouring of the Shire.  I get why Jackson cut it out, but I think doing so diminishes the hobbits. But the movies do diminsh the hobbits to make Aragorn,  Gimli, Legolas, and Gandalf  bigger heroes. The Scouring finishes the hobbits' character development arc. And the hobbits come into their own and solve their problems without Legolas trick shooting while surfing on a shield. And Sam's Gaffer gets some great lines.

And there's more hobbits as the Shirefolk rise up against oppression and then rebuild.

Then there's all the stuff Jackson inserted into the movies.

Elves at Helm's Deep? Sigh. Thank goodness he resisted the temptation to have a bad assed Lara Croft-ish Arwen arrive to save the day. He filmed it. But left it out thank God.

The Witch-King breaking Gandalf's staff at the siege of Minas Tirith. Really? Doesn't that rather render Gandalf impotent now? And Merry dealing the fatal blow with his elvish blade is downplayed in favour of Eowyn's blow.

Faramir dragging Frodo and Sam to Osgiliath and Frodo having that dumb face off with the Nazgûl.

Aragorn killing the Mouth of Sauron is definitely not cool either. Aragorn is a valiant, honorable king and knight. Killing an Ambassador, even the Ambassador of the Dark Lord, is a moral failing. Poor way to start your reign. 

I shan't bother itemizing what's wrong with The Hobbit movies. No one has time for that. 

But it was good to re-visit beloved stories, and refresh them in my memory.  Especially in our digital culture where the movies so easily erase the written text in the popular discourse. 

Meet the New Boss

Master-Yawdryl Paerwyn kept his eyes fixed forward, even though the new Is-Caerten's hat plumes bobbed directly in front of, and level with them. He wondered to himself, not for the first time, which Ancestor he had annoyed to get lumbered with this self-important runt of a quar. Said runt was the scion of a First Family and fresh out of Officer's School by the sounds of it.

He saluted the air above the Is-Caerten's hat with crisp precision. A flutter in his peripheral vision told him that the salute had been returned. He dropped his arm. 

"Master-Yawdryl Paerwyn reporting, Sir!"

"Stand easy Master-Yawdryl." Is-Caerten Gwyffyth ap Foldgyhth'wlech looked up at the large, burly Senior NCO. He'd need this remarkable example of soldiery on his side if he was to be successful in his new command, the 8th Company, 22nd Fusilier Regiment. The Master-Yawdryl relaxed and looked down at him, eyes tinged with curiosity. 

"I'll need someone to look after my kit, but until then I cadged a pot of tea from the Company Cook." Gwyffyth gestured to a chair. "I'll be Mother and pour. Sugar?"

Master-Yawdryl Paerwyn sat down stunned. 

"So we'll need to go over the company training and duty schedule, don't you think?"

Master-Yawdryl Paerwyn blinked in surprise. He was used to officers leaving him to do all the work while they ran up Mess bills.

"I'm sure you've got it all in hand, but I really should have an idea what the bucks are up to, don't you think?"

Paerwyn took the offered cup wordlessly. 

"I think I should inspect the company tomorrow. Just to see where we stand. Let the rhyflers have a look at the new Boss, so to speak."

Paerwyn found his voice. "Route march tomorrow, sir. 6 o'clock start." He prayed to whichever Ancestors still liked him that the new Is-Caerten liked to sleep in.

"Oh excellent! Full marching or battle order?"

"Marching, sir." Hoping this extra burden would help the junior officer remember a regimental staff meeting he had to attend. 

"Outstanding! I'll be at the barracks at quarter to six then ready to go! We can discuss ideas for improving training as we bimble along, listening to the rhyflers singing their marching songs."

Paerwyn sputtered inarticulately.

"Are you all right, Master-Yawdryl?" Is-Caerten Gwyffyth looked at him solicitously. He held out a plate. "Biscuit?"

******************

Here is batch number 2 of the Tollyn-Maeryn. I think the official intention is to use Crusader officers for the Tollyn-Maeryn. But when have I ever stuck to the official "lore?"

The officer is a spare Coftyran Baenyr who had broken at the ankles. I cut off his head, drilled out the neck and attached a Tollyn-Maeryn head with the hat. The ball shaped carving bit on my Dremel Tool has proven to be perfect for making new neck sockets to facilitate head swaps.

I used my Dremel Tool to shave the hood, which is prominent on Coftyran officers, off the back of the figure.

The Master-Yawdryl is identifiable by his sword. Again, I added a small pack to the shoulder belt.

The cook was a flash of inspiration. Fortunately, Don prints multiples, just in case, and these are great for inspiration. I thought that the Penny-farthing bicycle helped this army look that little bit more archaic and increase the Great War aesthetic. I did a head swap on the Crusader cook and disguised the very prominent Crusader back rig for packs with four spare plastic ration tubes.  I gave him a blue neckerchief as a nod to the Bavarian Corps in WW1 who faced the Canadian Corps in some key battles.

Finally, another Yawdryl and five more rhyflers. 

This gets the force up to an Officer, Master-Yawdryl, Company Cook, Messenger Squirrel Handler, two Yawdryls and 12 Rhyflers.

While I was slapping field grey around I painted that die cast truck I bought at Hotlead in March.

This gives me a nice convoy of two trucks now.

The Basing is a mix of model railway ballast and fine sand blasting medium.

Quar Road Trip

Every June we gather in deepest, darkest West Lorne for a game day at Rico's house for his birthday. He requested Quar assaulting trenches.

So I brought my Crusader company supported by a Sapper Squad, a field gun, and two heavy shotgun teams, and my Toulmorese combat team minus the tractor, attacking a trench line held by my Coftyran Company, supported by two M3b HMG teams, an RCO, and a Heavy Shotgun.

Crusaders moving through field gun fire (template) to get to the wire.

The Crusader and Toulmore mortars were very useful dropping smoke to blind the Coftyran heavy weaponry.

Birthday boy observing the mayhem

Toulmorese dashing for a breach in the wire

Rico da Barbarian and Keith ran the Coftyrans, Wierdy-Beardy, Big Dave and I ran the Crusaders. I warned Big Dave that this was the Toulmorean's first outing so he expected to get tabled. The Toulmoreans, brave lads that they are, did pretty well, even after their command team got wiped out by a burst of very well rolled machine gun fire.

Sappers dash through the smoke screen to assault the MG nest

Rico reinforced and this fight went on for several turns

If had remembered to track the shock then one side would have broken sooner I think... but my sappers eventually whittled him down to one NCO.

Heavy Shotgun team 

Section about to slide left to use the gap made by the Sappers

Wierdy-Beardy pushes up through the craters and blasted wood to take the Coftyran right flank

Big Dave rushes the MG nest on the Coftyran left. He wipes out the gun, but reinforcing rhyflers keep him from consolidating.

My section of two squads pushed up beside the Sappers to gain the trench and get embroiled in protracted fisticuffs. Here Keith is counter attacking with the Trench Raider group.

Lone Is-Caerten! He dodged left to join his remaining squad.

Toulmorese rhyfle squad storms the RCO position

Wierdy-Beardy has cleared the bunker with fire from his heavy shotguns and got his troops into the right end of the trench line

So that was interesting. At the end there were five hand to hand fights going on simultaneously along the trench line. I gave troops defending entrenchments an extra condition shift and assault oriented troops like Sappers, Trench Raiders and Grenadiers/Bombers extra lethal dice in hand to hand. The Trench Raiders with their SMGs and grenades were pretty nasty.

The attackers gained 3 tenuous toeholds, of which they might be able to hold one. But they did eliminate all of the Coftyran heavy weapons. Tracking Force Morale would probably have made victory or defeat clearer.

Everyone had fun at least. I totally forgot to keep the activation cards secret from the side that was activating. And I forgot to track shock. And I was tired and fighting a headache so I couldn't make sense of what the Cooks could do. For this event I should have trotted out Rhyfler's Rampant instead.